Tuesday, June 18

Over millennia, men have been dominant, aggressive, and emotionally repressive in relationships. However, Women’s desires have historically been misunderstood.

 Male-controlled norms, religious beliefs, and cultural stereotypes have stifled women’s autonomy. Some argue that women experience a different kind of desire from men, influenced by stress, emotions, and relationships, but until lately, it received no attention. Advocating for women’s recognition and empowerment in relationships has been paramount recently. But is it too late?


New-age femininity is an intricate blend of beauty norms, lifestyle flaunting, breaking conventions, and control tactics. While it promotes self-empowerment, it often embodies narcissistic and manipulative tendencies influenced by societal norms and personal desires for control. This transition highlights the complexities of new-age femininity, where empowerment can sometimes lead to negative traits like narcissism and manipulation.

Slay Queen Culture

A laser focus on deriving female value and worth from physical beauty and sexual attractiveness. It’s a social phenomenon characterized by flaunting wealth, beauty, and a lavish lifestyle, often portrayed through carefully curated photos and videos on social media. It promotes unrealistic standards, self-expression, and empowerment.

Bitch Culture

“Bitch culture” champions female independence and flouting societal norms. But it can foster narcissism, entitlement, and manipulation that harm relationships. Believing one deserves more than others and that men should always acquiesce can lead some women to control men’s behaviours through manipulation. Tactics like flattery, charm, or seduction manipulate men into doing whatever the woman wants. While confidence is positive, “bitch culture” risks relational dysfunction when empowerment becomes extreme self-absorption and control.

“Trans” sition

But new-age femininity isn’t just a reaction to cruelties of the past; it’s also a reinforcement of it. Becoming what medieval men were before the fight for equality taught men to do the right thing. New-age femininity desperately wants to become what medieval men liked in relationships in ancient times.

The godly Jezebel

The godly Jezebel Presently, women are rationalizing actions that seem indefensible. Many believe that to empower themselves, they must exert control over men, perpetuating misogyny and promiscuity. They praised this culture for being honest, confident, witty and authentic to self. Anything a man can do, a woman can too.

Are men the problem, or do women like idiots?

How do we break free from toxic femininity?

The Solution

Positive femininity must be pursued for better relationships to thrive – empathy, expressiveness, honesty, love, kindness, and nurturing. Positive masculinity, such as courage, leadership, responsibility, compassion, integrity, and self-control, must be encouraged for men.

Since women choose men, let me share a whisper I heard from an 81-year-old lady. Relationships must have a man who will lead with empathy and servant leadership. This is necessary because the man must lead an intelligent woman with respect. That means that as a woman, if you are afraid to submit or allow your man to lead your relationship, there is a high probability the man you have chosen is an idiot. This is because you are rational to discern that. Therefore, learn from older women how not to select an idiot.

Let’s challenge the toxic norms that poison our relationships and sense of self-worth this Valentine’s Day. This call to action emphasizes transforming toxic norms and embracing a more inclusive and empowering culture. Let’s strive for relationships built on mutual respect and empathy. And let’s work towards a world where toxic masculinity and toxic femininity are relics of the past, replaced by a culture that celebrates the full range of human expression and identity.

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